


Getting Messy

by misura



Category: The Chronicles of Riddick (2004)
Genre: M/M, Post-Chronicles of Riddick
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-30
Updated: 2020-07-30
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:00:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,278
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25608541
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/misura/pseuds/misura
Summary: Vaako really wishes Riddick would stop dumping dead bodies on his desk.
Relationships: Richard B. Riddick/Vaako (Riddick)
Comments: 13
Kudos: 179
Collections: Small Fandoms Fest





	Getting Messy

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ladydey](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladydey/gifts).



> prompt: _Riddick/Vaako, Riddick offers dead bodies like gifts; showing his affections with the number of dead he lays at your feet_

Vaako isn't sure at what point in time he signed up to be a glorified janitor.

He's the Lord Marshal's second-in-command, his right- _and_ -left hand man, and yet most of the time, what his job seems to come down to is cleaning up Riddick's bloody messes. Literally.

"Put this out with the trash, will you?" Riddick's burden hits the deck with a squishy sound.

_Another day, another body,_ Vaako thinks, half-resigned and half-annoyed. "As my Lord Marshal commands," he says.

Something of his feelings must have leaked through in his tone: Riddick pauses and gives him a look. "Problem?"

_You tell me._ They haven't converted a new planet in months. The Legion Vast have been sitting on their asses, getting restless, to say nothing of the other Necromongers.

Except for Vaako, of course, who's busier than he's ever been in his life, none of it with anything he actually enjoys doing.

Vaako meets Riddick's eyes, more or less without flinching. Riddick is Riddick, but Vaako's beginning to become more scared of dying from boredom and less of dying due to Riddick killing him.

He dreams of it sometimes, of making the challenge, of facing off against Riddick. Of Riddick _seeing_ him, giving Vaako his undivided attention, just for a little while. Just until Vaako's beaten and dead and gone, like everyone else stupid enough to try to take on Riddick.

"No," Vaako says, averting his eyes. "No problem." He leaves off Riddick's title on purpose, seeing if that might get him some sort of response.

Riddick gives him nothing. As usual. "Didn't think there was."

Soldiers who don't do any fighting or plundering still need to be fed. Riddick being disinclined to take an interest, it falls to Vaako to ensure they all get to eat.

He tries telling himself it's an honor, but mostly, it's a total pain in the ass. He's a Necromonger; Necromonger don't make nice with other people while haggling over the price for grain and rice and pickles and what-not.

Necromongers take what they want and destroy what they don't. _Keep what you kill._

"I think our offer's been more than generous," Vaako says. The truth is, he has no idea what he's doing.

He's tempted to think Riddick doesn't either, that they're learning together. He's pretty sure that's not the case, though. Riddick is doing whatever he wants, and Vaako's doing what needs doing, because no one else is going to step up.

The representatives of the merchant conglomerate makes some noises indicating disagreement.

Vaako tries to recall how much money he can actually afford to spend. Thanks to Riddick's - well, let's call it a 'hobby', there's no shortage of dead bodies. Not the easiest-to-trade commodity, but there's a market, and Vaako's tapped it.

Any day now, he's going to have a graph stuck in his head showing how many kills Riddick needs to make in a month in order for them to stay alive.

"Look," he says, trying to sound reasonable, "why don't we run the numbers again?" He'd prefer telling them to accept his terms or else - or better yet, tell them nothing at all. Why use words when you can let your actions speak for you instead?

Which is when Riddick walks in, blood all over him, none of it his, as far as Vaako can tell.

"Vaako. These guys giving you a hard time?"

Vaako fantasizes about saying 'yes', about watching Riddick kill these annoying fools for him, laying their bodies at his feet - or, fine, leaving it to Vaako to get rid of the mess. It wouldn't be about Vaako. Riddick kills because he enjoys killing. It's as simple as that. Nothing to do with Vaako.

"Nah," he says.

"My rooms, five minutes," Riddick says, stalking out again.

There's two more dead bodies dumped on Vaako's desk as he walks past, which is just peachy.

The door to Riddick's rooms slides open at his approach. Vaako wastes a few seconds getting annoyed about the poor security. What's it to him if Riddick makes it easy for would-be assassins?

Other than the bit where, if anyone kills Riddick, they're going to be Vaako's new boss, of course. For as long as they're going to live. Vaako's not wildly keen on yet another change in management.

"Hello?" Nothing. No Riddick.

Vaako experiences a moment of - not panic, but wariness. Anyone capable of taking down Riddick's going to be tough. Dangerous. _A worthy opponent,_ Vaako tries to think, except that the idea of anyone killing Riddick makes his blood boil. If anyone's got the right to do that, it's Vaako.

"Lord Marshal?" Soft, plush carpet. A couple of weapons on the walls, as if to provide aid to the ill-prepared assassin. No signs of a struggle, a fight.

Vaako becomes aware of the sound of a shower and curses himself for a fool.

A few moments later, the sound stops and Riddick appears, wearing nothing but a towel. Vaako tries not to stare. It's harder not to think of all the ways he might take advantage of this situation: grab one of the weapons off of the wall and strike. Riddick's unarmed; it might almost be an even fight.

Vaako figures he'd be able to draw blood, at the very least. He'd feel what it's like, to pit himself against Riddick's strength, Riddick's cunning. Riddick's body, slamming against his as they struggle for dominance, both of them fighting to come out on top, to claim the other one as theirs - their kill, their -

"Something you want?" Riddick asks, sounding amused.

Vaako swallows. "You commanded my presence, Lord Marshal."

"That's right, I did, didn't I?" Riddick sounds as if he'd forgotten all about that. "And you always do whatever I tell you to do, don't you?"

Vaako considers several pointed replies. "I am your loyal servant, Lord Marshal."

"Bet that's exactly what you told the last guy who was Lord Marshal," Riddick says. "But guess what, I'm not him. I think you cross me, you're dead. I don't like the way you look at me, you're dead."

"Must be a lot of people looking at you in ways you don't like," Vaako says. It's a risk: he can't recall ever even considering mouthing off to any of the previous Lord Marshals, but Riddick's Riddick.

Riddick grins. "A couple less every week."

Vaako snorts. "Right. So is this what you wanted to see me about? A warning?"

"Nah." Riddick shrugs. "I figure you might be an idiot, but you're not stupid."

"Thanks," Vaako says.

"You did catch the part where I called you an idiot, didn't you?"

Vaako wishes Riddick would maybe learn to use words, or at least get to the point. "Fine. I'll bite. What makes you think I'm an idiot?"

Riddick drops the towel.

Vaako tells himself not to look, but Riddick's wrong: Vaako's not actually an idiot.

"I brought you _how_ many dead bodies?" Riddick says. "And you just weren't getting the hint. So I figured I had to get a bit blatant about it."

"Huh," Vaako says. "It's smaller than I expected it to be."

"You know I'm going to make you eat those words, don't you?"

_Counting on it._ Vaako's mouth is dry. "Words are cheap."

All things considered, Vaako decides that maybe words are, in fact, overrated.

Riddick's curled up around him, half-possessive and half-protective.

"So hey, does this mean you're going to stop bringing me dead bodies?"

"Wouldn't count on it," Riddick says. His mouth is very close to Vaako's ear.

"I'd really appreciate it," Vaako tries.

"Well. I guess I could give you a shot at trying to convince me," Riddick says.


End file.
